I'm biggest your fan, California I'm coming home...

I don't know what I want to say at the moment, but I felt like updating since everything is boring on facebook and LJ. I am listening to Joni Mitchell. I haven't listened to her since I was a little kid. My older sister was in love with one of her albums, and the two of us would put it on and sing a long to it. Our favorite song was Circle Game. I used to have it memorized. I especially loved it when we would sing it at camp. Probably one of the best songs in the world.

I think we sang a lot of hippy folk songs at camp.

I miss those days. So to feel nostalgic, I go back and listen to old joni mitchell songs and think of my sister and camp.

Maybe I should get a hold of the Priscilla soundtrack and sing along to that too.

November here we come...

I have noticed that my life has taken an interesting turn. Last week I was informed that my friend's cousin apparently likes me. My first reaction was, "Why?! What the hell is wrong with him?!" Yeah, I have a lot of confidence. I then asked this friend that I thought he carried a torch for another friend of hers. She informed me that she wants nothing to do with him.

I obsessed for three days about this. Actually a bit longer. I finally told a friend all about this yesterday. That it never occurred to me that he might like me.

I always thought he was just tolerating my existence, and had better things to do with his life than talk to me. We are total opposites as well. I'm liberal, I hate the NY yankees, I read literature, I'm straight edge. He's a bad boy who goes for bad girls. I am a total nice girl.

My friend then pointed out the book The Lost Art of Keeping Secrets. I am like Penelope. This boy is like Harry. He has been acting like he tolerates Penelope's existence, but also kind of scares her. It turns out that he has liked her all the time. Gah! This is stupid. I can't stand to think of any of this. Time for coffee.

I feel crazy...

I hung out with a guy this evening. A guy that I am totally crazy about, and yet I didn't have the balls to kiss him. Why oh why...? We looked around at the galleries, ate pizza and laughed about all sorts of stuff. We went down to a lower floating dock, and dipped our feet in the water. We laughed some more, and he let me put on his sweater when I was cold. We even had our arms wrapped around the other, and yet, I could not kiss him. I feel so crazy at the moment. My tummy has crazy feelings, and my head is racing with thoughts of him. I have not felt like this before. It's really weird. What will happen next?

Some things never change...

Livejournal is down right now, so I thought I might post here to deal with my blogging withdrawal. There we go.

I saw an old friend yesterday. More like an ex-friend, but I am still civil and decent towards her, because that is the correct way to behave. Ask Miss Manners. I have found that she hasn't changed. She still thinks I have awful taste in boys, and I think the same of her. Apparently anyone remotely nerdy in any way is awful awful awful. This is a girl who also likes creepy redneck boys... ick. I also noticed that she has gained a ton of weight. There was a the part of me that felt good, because I looked really good compared to her. I shouldn't have thought that way, but everyone feels that way about their ex. Be they ex-friend, ex-boyfriend, and ex-husband. My other feeling was 'Why the hell did she get more guys than me?' I think I look all right for the most part, but she seems to attract all of them. I do have to remember that these guys she attracts are super creepy, and I am better off. I do feel better off. Cool. 

The things that I do...

I am waiting around for college's to send their notices of whether they like me or not. I hope they like me, especially Mills. I try not to think about it too much...

There is a guy that I am interested in, and he is interested in me too. We are supposed to go on a "date" pretty soon. I am both excited and a bit anxious. I want it to go well... but I don't want it to stop me from going to the college of my dreams. I can't count how many girls I know that have stayed close by, because of their boyfriends. I do not want to be that girl. If it does go somewhere... I am going to have to explain this. I shouldn't count my chickens as they say... It could very well be a complete disaster. You never know...

what's going on? as Marvin Gaye might say...

I realized that I have two weeks to get all of my college applications done. I am sooo hoping I get in somewhere. It's driving me crazy. I still have to finish up my essay, and do my FAFSA. ARGH! I am trying not to stress about it too much. I have been listening to the Beach Boys a lot. Especially their one song, Don't Worry Baby. It's comforting at the moment.

I have also been watching Buffy. I am totally in love with that show. I am doing lots of things to keep me calm.

At the moment I am in the college computer lab. Full of students who are desperately trying to get their papers written, and their research done. Does anyone ever stop and wonder, when will this stop? I know I do all the time. My time is spent studying and working. All for a college degree so I can get a job...

When will this stop?

Goodness!

I haven't posted here in such a long time. I have been focusing on college apps. and school work as of late. It leaves me exhausted every day. I wish I didn't have to go through all of this. Yet, if I want a good career in politics and libraries, I have to get through this.

I've been watching quite a few tv shows on DVD. Buffy the Vampire Slayer, ER, Firefly, etc. All amazing. I just watched the film Radio Days. It had been a long time since I had watched it. I forgot how much I really liked it. Lovely little anecdotes and memories about one's childhood during the 1940's, all while listening to the radio.

It snowed during exams, which made it very distracting. It also didn't help that the resident hitler youth had to ask an incredibly obvious question during the exam. It wasn't very fun...

Now to watch some more television...

At a staff meeting...

I haven't been to a B.R. staff meeting in a really long time. I have no class, so I am the staff meeting right now. It is... interesting. There are a lot of new faces. That's kind of cool. At the moment someone is freaking out because their note is not in the log book. The manager ran into the back office to check to see if it's there. They gave up now. She is going to explain what it says then. Hrm. Apparently some girls were total bitches, and were harrassing some poor kids at the B.R. She kicked them out. It was over a pair of pants. Oh girls... This isn't the first time either. They are just all-around evil mean freshman girls. Those were always the kind of girls I was afraid of. Shivering in the bathroom stall, praying for them to leave. Anyway, that seems to be the excitement for the moment.